Change your name to bekah.
So I’m all, yes I’m a good girlfriend, and thinking that I will whip up something special for mine and Eric’s six month anniversary, I buy strawberries and chocolate chips. Feeling like Bobby Flay, I pour copious amounts of chocolate into a pan, add some butter and milk and light the flames. A menstruating girls dream come true.
But then chocolate, while, yes, it melted, begins to turn a very dark brown, clump together, and evaporate. YES. IT EVAPORATED. I can’t watch my 20 dollars of food money go down the drain!? I sacrificed to use it for purely this dessert, this high end luxury, instead of buying myself anything but cereal for the week.
So I throw in more milk and begin to stir as fast as Michael Phelps can swim.
Needless to say, they aren’t the sexiest strawberries in town but I bet they will get me a nice backrub.