I’m an awful person

I have gained weight since coming to college (who hasn’t) but it seems like I’m the only one and I look at myself and I’m disgusted and I feel so fat and I just want to be skinny and have a flat stomach like I did over the summer and I could lean over and not have rolls when I sit down going over the edge of my jeans and feel sexy and wear tight shirts and I hear adderall makes you drop pounds like mad fast and I want it so bad but idk anyone who has any and so I set up an appointment with the doctor and I’m gonna go in and ramble on about how I can’t ever concentrate or sleep and my mind flips from one thing to the next and make them think I’m add so they will give me adderall and if that doesn’t work then I will just cut again because well I miss it and I’ll sleep better and I’ll lose my appetite and damn thinking about it ok bye

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